BE IN SILENCE

Allow White Space

I am Listening

For What Emerges

Poem?

Prose?

Questions?

Feelings?

Or Something Entirely Different?

What Comes Up?

Together

From Silence

We Created

This

The sight of the stars makes me

Reflect, sleep, dream 

and

Be still

Be Not swept away in the fear

Be Not afraid of Profound Silence

Where thoughts slow

and enjoyment is now.

It is In the space between 

Where redemption song sings

In the deep of the soul,

that truth lies,

and cannot be known,

Until the body falls away

and truth flies joyously

in freedom

into the light.

Where the Heart sheds tears

Where Being smiles

Meaning arises

in the value of non-action.

Teaching without words,

performing without actions:

that is the Master’s way.

The gentlest thing in the world
overcomes the hardest thing in the world.
That which has no substance
enters where there is no space.

____________________________________________________________________

I promised “Together, from what emerges, as a community, we will write the next post.”

I am honored and deeply touched by what you have created in this space.

Thank you Joe, Gwyn, Alex Marion and Dale, with a little help from Van Gogh, Einstsein, the Tao Te Ching, and an anonymous Chinese friend.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Silence is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

According to leadership and organizational experts Jeffrey Pfeffer and Margaret Wheatley, fear is both pervasive and detrimental in the workplace.

Organizations… are cluttered with control mechanisms that paralyze employees and leaders alike. These mechanisms seem to derive from our fear — our fear of one another, of a harsh competitive world, and of the natural processes of growth and change that confront us daily. Years of such fear have resulted in these byzantine systems. We never effectively control people with these systems, but we certainly stop a lot of good work from getting done.

~ Margaret Wheatlely

 

One of the most pervasive emotions in the workplace today is fear…
One of the side effects of fear is that it absolutely retards the flow of information inside a company. …Because nobody wants to be the bearer of bad news, nobody inside those companies knows what is going on..Yet another side effect is that fear causes individuals to focus only on the short term and on their own survival.

~Jeffrey Pfeffer

Why build on a foundation of fear when fear itself is detrimental to what we are here to do?

Fear.

Fear of losing control. Fear of not achieving goals. Fear of succeeding and then losing it all.

Fear.

Overcoming Fear

Quotes about overcoming fear abound.

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.”                                                                                                                   ~Ambrose Redmoon

~ Marianne Williamson

~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

~ Bill Cosby

Quotes, like poetry, load a simple sentence with paragraphs of meaning, wisdom and feeling, but they don’t change the drivers of behavior.

So, let’s consider something different.

The Shaman’s Way

The Shaman's Way

According to shamanistic beliefs, parts of the self (or parts of the soul) flee when physical or psychological trauma occurs. Trauma is simply a real or perceived threat that overcomes our abilities to cope. This process, in which parts of ourselves flee the scene, begins when we are young. These parts are fragile. When they leave guards come into place and hold the parts in protective custody to ensure no further harm befalls them. In later years, when our capabilities are more developed, we no longer need the guards, but they don’t know this and remain in place.

In western cultures we attempt to regain our fearlessness by way of demands or insults, as in “Just buck up,” or “Don’t be such a baby.” These methods fail to convince the guards, who are also insulted by the lack of respect for the very fine job they’ve done over the years. As a result, the guards stand stronger and protect with greater ferocity.

What to Do

Step 1.

Find the part of yourself hidden in the cave, the castle, underground or far into the desert. What happened? Why did she leave? How old was she? What is she wearing?

Step 2.

Notice the guards. Address them respectfully. Recognize and appreciate the protection they’ve offered. Thank them. Then let them know you need to have that part of yourself once again and that you are capable of ensuring she will not be hurt.

Step. 3

Ask the guards if they are willing to step aside. When they do welcome home the missing part. Bring her into your heart. Make room for her in your soul. Watch her as she returns.

Step 4.

Attend to her during the following week. Do something age appropriate together. Take her for a walk. Read her a book. Ask how she’s doing. Recovered parts of the self are at first fragile and can easily disappear again, so take care.

You are building a muscle called courage.

Keep up the workouts.

The more you do, the stronger the muscle becomes.

And then, when she is fully back, integrated once again, and your muscles are strong, fly with her into the face of what you used to fear and whatever you might fear in the future.

As a leader, know when your actions are based in fear.

Find the courage muscle.

And now, do something different.

Instead of closing down in fear, open up to possibility.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Corporate Fear is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Felice Schwartz

 

She was obsessed with fairness

A woman of great certainty who saw the world in black and white.

Later in her life she asked me to teach her about gray.

He was gentle, sweet and unreservedly supportive.

Tony Schwartz

His mother, Felice Schwartz, founded Catalyst, an organization that expands opportunities for women and business using each to promote and evolve the other. You may know Tony as a writer for Harvard Business Review as well as President and CEO of The Energy Project and author of the best selling book Be Excellent at Anythin. For NOW, in this post, he is his mother’s son. What follows is excerpted from an April 2011 interview with Tony to discover how Felice Schwartz influenced his leadership. I discovered way more than that, and trust you will too.

Why and how did your mother start Catalyst?

She had been intentionally out of the workplace for a decade while raising her children. When she wanted to go back she found no ramps, no stairways and no doors, so she started an organization to enable women with children to combine work and family. She gathered five board members, all deans of colleges including Smith, her own alma mater. She then set out to convince companies they were losing money by failing to hire these talented women. My mother also co-authored a book entitled How to Go to Work When Your Husband Is Against It, Your Children Aren’t Old Enough, and There’s Nothing You Can Do Anyhow.

This section is from The Jewish Women’s Archive* and not part of Tony’s interview

Catalyst’s original mission was:

“to bring to our country’s needs the unused abilities of intelligent women who want to combine work and family.” Felice Schwartz was determined to put Catalyst’s definition,

“in terms that were acceptable and non-threatening.”

What was you Dad’s reaction?

He idolized my mother. He was awed by who she was and what she did. He was extremely proud of her. All the while, he too was a very accomplished man, a scientist and educator who worked at the graduate level in a medical school. He was gentle and sweet, accepting and non-judgmental – not at all macho. He was the gentle soul in our family, probably more like a traditional mother – sweet and accepting. He was very beloved, naturally kind, and as unreservedly supportive a person as you can imagine. At times my mother was bloodied by the battle she was fighting. He was the one she came to for support and unconditional love.

How did your parents inform who you are as a leader?

My life’s mission is profoundly influenced by my mother. It was not always easy between us, so it is a great irony to me that the work about which I am most passionate is so similar to what she was passionate about. I too am committed to her fierce belief that we are here to make a difference, to make the world better. She fought for women to have jobs they otherwise wouldn’t have. I am fighting for people to have lives they otherwise wouldn’t have. It is a natural evolution of her work.

Most of the qualities great leaders need today are those described as female – tolerance for paradox, self awareness, empathy, sensitivity. I also believe it is critical for the leader to be aware of how people in the company are feeling. I learned about sensitivity to others more from my father than from my mother.

Integrating the Paradox – Celebrating the Opposites

The way I think about leadership integrates what I learned from my father as a role model about the people and my mother as a role model about the mission. I also think I was influenced by their lack of concern about traditional roles. I always assumed my wife would work and that we would share parenting.

At a conceptual level I engage and embrace opposites. The Greek notion of Anacoluthia (ideas that are out of sequence and do not naturally follow each other) holds that no virtue is a virtue by itself. For example, tenacity without flexibility is stubbornness. Seeing the world in certain black and white terms does not serve us well in these times. To me, it is almost axiomatic that to be a great leader today means to have an embracing view of the world and to be capable of holding the tension between seemingly opposite qualities.

Tony Schwartz

• Confidence and Humility
• Toughness and Tenderness
• Courage and Prudence
• Brutal Honesty and Empathy

In the workplace, we have overvalued the traditionally masculine qualities I’ve listed (above on the left) and undervalued the traditionally feminine ones (on the right). Great leaders are capable of valuing opposite qualities and moving between them with flexibility. The impulse is to choose up sides because it creates for us the illusion of a safer world. But the world is too complex for that. It is unequivocally a both-and, not so much an either-or.

I learned a lot of these lessons growing up in a non-traditional family where everything was questioned.

*Accessed from Jewish Women’s Archive http://jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/schwartz-felice-nierenberg on 5/24/11

 

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Leading With Paradox – Notes from a Feminist’s Son is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Most of my work involves executive coaching and consulting to leaders regarding change, developing leadership teams, innovating in the work place and the like. I also work with a small number of psychotherapy patients, because I love to see people blossom regardless of the garden’s name or location. Sometimes, maybe often, the learning from one garden applies to the other.

This post is one such example. It is about learning to be with and hold the intensity of life – alone, something leaders have to do but not among the competencies we often discuss.

Rewired Brain

The Rewired Brain

The other day a patient lamented, “I wish Peter [her husband] could appreciate how much I’ve changed. I’ve rewired my brain. I can feel it. I know it looks different in there. I wish I could show him before and after pictures.” She’s right. She has over-ridden and overwritten well worn neural pathways and created new ones. She no longer travels the Highway of Anxiety or the Mile of Fear. A year ago, she was afraid to open her door at night and terrified by noises in the dark. Overwhelmed by demands of caring for her one year old son and other facets of adult life, she fled to her parents’ home daily. She now travels along streets named I Can Do This and It’s Cool to Be an Adult. I most enjoy watching her move on down I’m Loving My Life Road.

Now What?

What about her lament, her desire for others to recognize the degree and intensity of change with her? “That’s the next step, learning to hold all the emotion yourself, without the need for others to know or appreciate. Sometimes it’s only for you.” I explained.

I learned this from my practice supervisor years ago when he said,”Being a psychologist is a very lonely profession.” I was surprised. How could I be lonely when I have such intimate conversations with people? He went on, “You have spectacular moments. You can be awe-struck at times, but you can never share the experience. You have to learn to hold it and to be with the loneliness.” He was right. There have been times I’ve sat in my office after a patient leaves, unable to move from the chair. I have unsent tear stained letters written to patients when our work and our relationship ends.  I write them for myself as a way to “hold” and at the same time “release” the experience.

This holding is a tough one, totally do-able but an odd kind of loneliness not marked by sadness, just alone-ness. It’s a muscle many of us don’t learn to exercise, to be alone with our thoughts and our feelings without acting on the urge to tell, to share.

But there is a reward. Held thoughts and feelings morph. They produce.

Try it. You might like it.

All-one. Alone.

The Leader’s Loneliness

Leadership is also a lonely sport. It demands the ability to hold life, at times without solace, comfort or sharing.

I was thinking about this the other day, when news of Osama Bin Laden’s death was reported. I pictured the public appearances President Obama made during the days leading up to this event, knowing all the while what was about to take place. Meantime, he had other presidential duties to perform, and he did so without ever appearing to be a man holding the tension of what was unfolding.

To see an actual demonstration, watch this video of President Obama addressing The White House Correspondent’s dinner that took place a few days before the invasion. Please do enjoy the humor while you watch.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

I’ve Rewired My Brain, Now What? is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Talk to the Hand

Two years after the end of our coaching engagement my client Helen and I discussed what would become this post.

Step 1. The Water

Helen is a Director at a major bio-medical company and designated successor to the current Executive Vice-president of HR. To prepare  for that role, Helen and her manager engage me as a coach. When we first meet, Helen states her belief that relationships “should not matter at work. People should simply do their jobs because that is what they are paid to do.” I scratch my head on this one – a high potential HR Director who thinks people are automatons. Privately and confidentially Helen’s manager tells me the CEO does not support Helen as the successor for EVP of HR.

Helen seems rigid in her beliefs. The coaching assignment will be a challenge. Is change possible? Can I find a way into that change – a lever or some bait – so to speak?  At this time, I have no idea what it will be.

Step 2. The Fish

On her 360 assessment, Helen scores well in achievement related areas but falls short in relationship building competencies. In my head I hear Helen saying, “So what?” After all, relationships should not matter.

Step 3.  The Hook

The first challenge – find a hook. A wise professor, easy on the eye as well, told us when administering psychological tests, “First create an alliance with the patient by identifying what’s in it for him. What does he want to know and how can the test results provide answers? This ensures the patient will put forward his best effort, which is what you want to see.”

What does Helen need to do better, faster, easier?  “Lead change more effectively,” she answers. Bingo. She knows she has to get people to buy into change – ergo relationships.

Step 4. The Bait

“Would you be willing to experiment for two months with some different behaviors based on the hypothesis that relationships really do matter at work.  If the experiment don’t work or you’re not comfortable you go back to the way you were doing things before.”

Helen: “I can’t afford to take the time away from the work. How will everything get done?”
We figure out what tasks she can delegate, but she is still worried. We shorten the experiment to one month. (Remove the obstacles.)
“Fine, but I still think relationships should not play a role at work.”

“That’s okay. I’m not asking you to change what you think, just to experiment. In fact, why would you change?  You’ve been successful, and now you’re in line to become the head of HR. You current beliefs have served you well. (Support the resistance.)

Helen identifies 4 actions.

1. Spend 1:1 time with each staff member listening to what’s on their minds and help in whatever ways I can.
2. Take one direct report to lunch each week.
3. When someone does an excellent job or goes above and beyond leave them a sticky note and a small inexpensive gift. The note will say thank you and identify the specifics of what they did and how it helped her or the department.
4. Host an all staff lunch.

Step 5. The Catch

One month later Helen reports, “Things are better. It’s easier to get people to do things, especially if it involves change. But this doesn’t come naturally to me, not who I am. I really have to focus and put time and effort into it. It’s hard.”

Step 6. Release or Keep?

“So do you want to stop?”

“No. Things are better. My job is actually a little easier.”

The Trophy

A  year later Helen sends me an email. It features a photo of her standing between the CEO and the Chief Medical Officer. Helen beams as they award her the trophy for “Manager of the Year.” Over our celebration lunch, Helen tells me the award is based on employee nominations that are reviewed and voted by the executive committee.

Three months later I get the following email from Helen. It includes the text of a note she received from one of her direct reports.
Hi Anne,
I just wanted to share what a long way I have come
I think getting this e-mail was better then getting the award. I cried…

“I have to say that in all my working years,  I have never worked with a manager so efficient, talented, knowledgeable as you are.

I have not seen a manager take such pride and initiative in communicating with her staff as you do.   We are so lucky to have you as our manager on our team.

Jack Davis made an announcement at 7:30am and a conference was conducted by you at 8:30 am.  So Impressive.

Your thorough explanations and your ways of explaining things are so clear and understandable.

You have a natural gift of management style and you should be so proud of yourself as we all are.   You are always looking out for your staff and I am so proud of being on your team.”

The Debrief

Helen claims that identifying concrete steps was critical for her. The sticky notes and prizes have morphed into a token system, and her employees covet the tokens. On leaving the department for a promotion, one of them recently lamented the loss of tokens and prizes as one of the things they will miss most.  A final quote from Helen.

“When we first started working together I couldn’t imagine how I would find the time to do my job AND invest in relationships. Now I can’t imagine how I could possibly do my job WITHOUT investing in relationships. It’s who I am and I get back twice as much as what I give.”

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

The Experiment – Reflections from Coach & Coachee is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Duped Again

Over the past few months I’ve been engaged in several conversations about how we get fooled in business and in life. The first discussion was with Dorothy Dalton, executive search and career consultant, after she posted an article about being duped by a colleague. The second series of conversations took place after the discovery that a social media rock star, who was purportedly orphaned as a child and raising money for an orphanage through sales of his book, was and still is a fraud. No orphanage and probably no orphan was he. And of course Bernie Made-off-with-your-money comes up often as well.

While I have no academic credentials to claim expertise on the topic, I have been duped enough times to have learned a few things. But let me be more clear in the extent of my studies. I was duped by the same person repeatedly over the course of a number of years. So you see, I’ve had the opportunity to study the pattern up close and personal and in accordance with the scientific method, I repeated the experiment at least three times. The result was always the same. The promise made was not kept,  and I always came up empty. I, Professor Dupid, the constant variable, was fooled each and every time.

The Duper

People ask how to identify dupers sometimes referring to them as sociopaths. To fully understand the dynamic and to avoid it altogether it is necessary not only to identify the duper but the dupee inside each of us as well.

The Duper

• knows how to read you (and others)
• lacks a sense of truly caring about people
• uses what he reads to his own advantage
• is cold hearted but appears to really care
• demonstrates what the duped wants and needs – to be special (Bernie Madoff), to be seen (my duper), to be loved, to be safe, to be rich, to know the answers without having to learn

The Dupee

The Dupee, that’s me and you, has a longstanding unfulfilled need. A father’s adoration. A mother’s understanding. A sense of fulfillment. Being special, seen completely, or loved unconditionally. Perhaps we had it once and lost it or never experienced it at all. The need is often outside our awareness, but it can drive us relentlessly to seek its fulfillment nonetheless.

Why is Charlie Brown susceptible to Lucy’s tricks over and over? He longs to be included. He needs a friend. Lucy repeatedly provides the appearance that she will answer Charlie’s longing, only to take it away at the very moment when he is about to touch the pigskin. Why? Because Lucy is not and never will be the friend that Charlie needs.

What did the social media rockstar, the man who would take care of orphans, provide? A sense that the world yet might one day be perfect. It could be a place where people take care of those who have lost it all. Why would that reel us in like hungry fish? If the world is a place where orphans can receive love then it may just be a place where the dupee can recover a parent’s perfect love or receive it for the first time. If orphans can be rescued so too might I.

How to Stop Being Duped

End the longing. Why? The need is old and the time to fulfill it has long since past. A child who lacked proper nutrients to support his growth at age six cannot at age 36 make up for what he missed so long ago. The same is true for the psychological building blocks. Attempts to fill childhood needs in adult years is like pouring water into a hole in the sand. The water is continuously absorbed and the hole is never filled.

How do you stop the longing? Grieve what never was or what has been lost, so you can let it go. Then what? Then you will notice the crack in the Duper’s veneer. You will see what is there and what is not, because your needs no longer fool you to wish into existence that which cannot be. You will hear that the man who would save the orphans has a voice like a mouse. When you hear it you will turn away. You will trust that Bernie Madoff offers something too good to be true, and you will turn away. You will know that the woman or the man who promises to rescue you is a fantasy, and you will turn away. You will know the one who guarantees you riches will become so himself and leave you penniless. You will see the greed in his hands. You will hear it in their voices. You will see it in their eyes. You will read it in their hearts. You will know because you cannot be fooled by your own longing.

Perhaps none of this applies to you. Then again, perhaps the arena of dupidness is buried deep as was mine (pun). Walk away. Let this brew in the way back of your mind. Something may emerge later.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Been Duped? Don’t Want to Be Duped Again? Read This. is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Michael is a sales manager in a high tech company.  He is very task focused and finds it difficult to simultaneously drive goals and attend to relationships.  During  a 360 interview one of his direct reports provides the following feedback.  “Michael takes the wind right out of my sails. When he called the other day, I was telling him about progress my guys were making on a tough account.  I was really psyched.  I don’t get how he didn’t hear that.  Maybe he did.  Anyhow, he cut me off with, ‘That’s good,’ and didn’t even take a breath before letting me know he was upset with me because he hadn’t yet received data he needed for a report. He really burst my bubble. When the call was over I just shut my laptop and was pretty much done for the day.”

Frustrated that his sales team is not achieving their goals, Michael asks for help assessing the situation and agrees to work with a coach.  After reviewing 360 feedback they determine that his relationships with his direct reports is at the heart of the problem. Together they examine Michael’s current approach and the assumptions on which it is founded.  Michael believes that people will and should follow a leader based on the quality of his ideas and their confidence in his strategies.  Furthermore he thinks people’s feelings about a manager should not play a role in their performance.  As a result of these beliefs Michael focuses on communicating strategies and goals, managing execution and measuring results while paying little attention to the quality of his relationships.   He assumes that people understand what is important to him and should deliver accordingly.  When this does not happen, he becomes annoyed and delivers pointed feedback in an impatient and critical tone.   

Michael agrees to consider a different set of behaviors based on the assumption that the quality of the relationship between leader and followers contributes to motivation and performance.  He also agrees to a period of experimentation with related behaviors that include empathic listening,  reflecting his understanding of what is important to his team members, and being more supportive.  

Michael’s first assignment using this approach is to share the themes of his 360 feedback with each of his direct reports and to ask them for examples of interactions that had a negative effect on them.  Under these very challenging conditions Michael remains non-defensive and listens with empathy to people’s stories.  He is surprised to hear how he made people feel and offers sincere apologies.  He also commits to change and asks for help and patience while working to developing better relationships with his team members.  People’s feelings about and responses to Michael begin to change immediately. 

The experiment proves successful and Michael permanently adapts the new behaviors and beliefs.  The employee quoted above speaks differently of Michael now. “I don’t avoid him anymore. I call him, let him know what’s going on and ask for his input and advice.”

Things look a lot different from Michael’s perspective as well. “Now that people know I care, they are asking, ‘What can I do for you, for the company?’ There is buy in to the message that comes from me as a leader. Critical things are getting done with much less push from me and more pull from them.” Michael’s region has been exceeding their sales goals every quarter for the past year and they are the first U.S. region in the company to achieve greater than 50% market share.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Empathy Improves Team Performance is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Imagine you are the V.P. of small-mid-size trucks and SUV division for a U.S. automaker. While visiting a dealership you see a woman get into her new truck which has just undergone a routine 5000 mile maintenance check. She carries a laptop and purse on one arm and her one year old child in the other.  She reaches awkwardly across her body to retrieve keys from her purse all the while struggling to maintain her balance and hold her baby boy. She holds the keys in her mouth in order to transfer them to her right hand without dropping him. She opens the rear passenger door and clumsily flings her purse and laptop across the baby’s carrier careful not to swipe him as she does so. She struggles in her fitted skirt as she maneuvers the baby into his car seat which she can barely reach given her 5’4″ height. Your own body is twisting like a pretzel as you involuntarily mirror her movements. Once the child is securely fastened she closes the rear door and lifts the heavy front door handle. She mutters to herself and anyone within ear shot as she examines a newly manicured and now broken nail. Next she climbs awkwardly into the driver’s seat which requires her to take a step larger than her fitted skirt allows. Once seated she reaches diagonally across and behind the front seat, to retrieve  a cell phone from her purse. With this full length stretch she is practically lying across the passenger seat and has disappeared from your view. You sweat just watching her.

Your natural empathic response to this woman becomes a catalyst for change in the way you think about your customers and you would like others in your division to achieve the same level of understanding. The next day you return to your office with a plan. You will take your top 50 design engineering and marketing managers on a field trip where you will have several trucks of the same model you saw at the dealership.  Each manager will don a size appropriate fitted skirt, high heels, carry a doll in one arm, a purse laptop on the other and get into the truck. Why? Because women are a significant growth sector in your division. They make or influence an increasing percentage of all truck and SUV purchases. You believe that ergonomic re-design of key features will help capture a greater share of this growing market. 

A year later dealers’ initial reports on the re-engineered models indicate that women are showing greater interest. Women account for a 2% increase in overall sales of trucks and SUVs.  

You can increase your capacity for empathy and use it to make more effective decisions and achieve better organizational performance.  To find out how, read Michael’s story at Empathy Improves Team Performance.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Empathy, Product Design and Increased Sales is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Regardless of how they name it, leadership experts are calling for transformational leadership -”the ability to engage with others in such a way that leaders and followers raise one another to higher levels of motivation and morality”  (Burns, 1978).  Few, however, directly identify the cornerstone of transformational leadership – ego development.  

In recent years we have seen a variety of labels and models: Leadership Agility (Joiner and Joseph); Integral Leadership (Wilbur); Seven Transformations (Torbert).  Some, including Daniel Goleman write about specific competencies such as emotional intelligence.   All share the central idea that the era of the heroic leader acting on his own has long since gone.  The world changes too fast; the issues are too complex and multi-faceted; the expertise required is too varied and deep.  Problems are messy and complicated.  People must work collaboratively and tap the collective intelligence of the larger whole.  We must be invested in finding solutions that exceed individual needs and work on behalf of our higher interests. 

Here is what  Linda Hill professor of business administration and faculty chair of the High Potential Leadership Program at Harvard University says about what leaders need to be and do.

  “Leaders need to adapt a more inclusive, collaborative style [because] today’s complex environment often demands a team approach to problem solving. This requires a leader, who among other things is comfortable sharing power and generous in doing so, is able to see extraordinary potential in ordinary people…Leadership is a collective activity in which different people at different times – depending on their strengths, or ‘nimbleness’ – come forward to move the group in the direction it needs to go. [The group] doesn’t have to wait for and then respond to a command from the front.  That kind of agility is more likely when a leader conceives her role as creating the opportunity for collective leadership, as opposed to merely setting a direction.”

Experts are clear about what is needed but less so about how we can identify leaders who have these attributes or how to develop them.  It seems to me that ego development is the cornerstone of transformational leadership.  To create an environment where the collective intelligence of the group emerges, where power is shared and collaboration is key requires a leader who does not need first and foremost to gratify his ego.  He does not need to be seen as the one with the answers, the expert, or even the leader.  He does not need to be admired.  While many of those who write about transformational leadership hint at this aspect, few name it outright, but I think it is important to do so.  Why?  Once we identify ego development as a core feature of transformational leadership, leaders and those who coach and develop them can work on it together.  Without this, we are often teaching skills to people who will ultimately fail to use them to effect the kind of change that is needed.  People know when leaders are feeding their own ego, and this is the greatest trust breaker of all, but like the emperor’s new clothes, the ego rarely gets named. 

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Transformational Leadership and Ego Development is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology