Preamble: As you read this post, please be mindful that I believe both men and women, The Masculine and The Feminine, are required to lead for and into a future we need and one we must pursue. This post, and many others, emphasize The Feminine and women, because it and we have been missing from the leadership equation in business. Had men been missing, I hope and trust I would advocate for The Masculine. Why business? In developed countries business is a tremendous lever for change. For profit enterprises have both a sense of urgency and the resources to lead a paradigm shift, not to the exclusion, however, of government, not for profits, and other organized communities.

The Sign Reads

Point 1.

Emerging global conditions are like a neon sign flashing warnings of what’s required on the road ahead. It reads PARADIGM SHIFT.

What are the conditions behind this sign?

• Failing governments
• Failing economies that don’t respond to methods previously used to “fix” such problems
• Extreme weather conditions (This one is just beginning.)
• Out of control U.S. health care costs that we cannot fix
• Extinction/depletion of species and natural resources that will not and cannot be restored (Been fishing lately? Catch much?)

What’s called for is a BIG SHIFT – not a small adjustment, or a tweak, or a stronger pull of some previously used lever. These moves are akin to rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.

Paradigm Shift

The shift involves our assumption that

Growth is good.

Bigger is better.

More is desirous.

A bigger house. A bigger car. A bigger business. A bigger economy. Bigger breasts. Erection doesn’t last long enough? (Longer is the time version of bigger.) We can fix that too. Caution though – 3 days is too much. See your doctor.

Grow the economy. Grow your business. If your children aren’t tall enough give them growth hormones. And have you seen the growing girth of the population? Bigger portions please.

Because, after all, bigger is better. Growth is good. It’s the natural way of things, or is it?

To get bigger we are borrowing against a future that won’t exist, at least not in the way we picture it, because of the very fact that we are borrowing against it.

If we don’t make the shift voluntarily, and we may not, IT will make us. Nature has a way of balancing herself.

Why the Shift Isn’t Happening

Point 2.

People who come to power in the current paradigm are least likely to see the assumptions underlying said paradigm. They are not bad people, just fish swimming in the water. They are unlikely to see that their assumptions, around which they build their lives and the systems that govern their lives, are not givens or natural laws, such as gravity, but conditions they have created. They don’t see that these created assumptions build a story. It is a story those in power, the ones who get to create the prevailing belief systems, tell themselves about the world, that results in a world about which they tell themselves that story. For the story creators to see these assumptions would be like fish seeing the water in which they swim. They don’t. It simply was, is and always will be. They know nothing else.

Why Women Can Create the Shift

Point 3.

Women are not currently the driving power in business. It is not our story, so we have a vantage point to see the assumptions on which the story is built. Some of us see other plausible assumptions and the stories they can create. We’d like to change things. How do I know? We asked. (Jane Perdue is my partner in seeking answers from women.) We did the research. We surveyed over 200 professional business women, most of whom work in large national or multinational corporations, to find out why they aspire to positions of power – to what end? Their top two priorities are “financial security for my family” not financial growth or riches, and “to lead change and make the world a better place.”

The Paradox of Power

Paradox

Point 4.

It’s tricky. Women have to come into power in a system that does not reflect the way we think about or use power, and simultaneously we have to create the shift to a new way of thinking about and using power. We have to know how to push from both sides, as pictured in the broom with two handles. Then there is the question of whether we will use our power to change the game, the rules and the desired outcomes or whether we will we be co-opted along the way? The story that holds the answer to this question has yet to be told.

Here are my recommendations for creating a story we will be proud of and in which future generations will live enriched (not by dollars) lives.

1. Replace BIGGER. Make a shift.

I like fulfilling.

Is your life fulfilling?

Are you fulfilling your purpose for being here?

Are you full yet? Yes? Good, time to stop eating.

You may choose a different concept. That’s fine.

The first order of business is to understand and stay true to WHY we want power. On behalf of what are we called to lead?

What is the story you want to tell about the world you helped to create?

2. Dress ourselves up in suits of power and get in the game, but never forget the purpose for which we donned those suits.

Understand the current rules.

Once there, and that means all along the way, create the shift.

Start pushing the broom from the other side.

3. Nelson Mandela this thing.

We are not better than men.

We simply have something different to offer, and it is needed now.

We also need men and women working together to make this new paradigm work.

Without men we will simply become fish in a different pond that cannot see the water in which they swim.

Here’s a sample of what could be.

It is new story two women have already created. Enjoy.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

PARADIGM SHIFT and THE PARADOX of POWER is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Why I Advocate for Women

I don’t remember a time when I wasn’t an advocate for women leaders and encouraging traditionally feminine leadership attributes. This may be related to my tendency towards styles that favor the feminine over the masculine as indicated by every personality assessment I’ve taken, from the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator to the Predictive Index to the Enneagram to the FIRO-B. I focus on people before tasks, values-based decisions before decisions based on logic, “heart” before “head” or “gut,” and belonging before dominance.

Because I’m Gay, Grew Up in Japan, and Wired That Way

Some might think that as a gay man I’m naturally more in touch with my “feminine side” than heterosexual men.  I don’t necessarily disagree, but I think it’s just as likely that spending five years of my childhood in Japan had a profound impact on my values as they relate to community vs. the individual, and it’s just as likely that I’m just wired this way.

Throughout my career, I’ve been coached (by men and women alike) to adopt a more masculine style.  Of course, no one ever used those exact words, but that’s the crux of their argument.  And they were (and are) probably right.  Inching toward a style that strikes a better balance between masculine and feminine might very well be valuable to me, as it would be for anyone else.  At the same time, I am what I am.  You are who you are, he is who he is, and she is who she is.  If organizations are to reap the maximum benefits of both leadership styles, the best and easiest way to do that is to value both, encourage both, and promote both – so that those who typify both are present when important decisions are being made, and neither group sacrifices their authenticity.

Because There Are No Organizations Where Sexism Does Not Exist

Throughout my career, I’ve encountered organizations that claim there is no sexism in their culture.  As proof, they usually offer up one or two out of hundreds who have risen to senior leadership.  If these women can do it, they reason, there’s absolutely no reason why others can’t.  I have met these women. Without fail they are textbook examples of masculine leadership styles: focus on task, logical decision-making, unafraid to ruffle feathers in order to make their case.  In most cases, the women also made a conscious decision not to have children, which left them unencumbered by work-life considerations that most women (and an increasing number of men) in today’s workforce are focused on.  These organizations were not only rife with sexism, and treating the vast majority of their female employees very poorly, they were missing out on what half the population had to offer.  Women and men with more traditionally feminine leadership styles were unseen and unheard in these organizations, and the decisions made by the senior leadership teams were made quickly and without a lot of conflict – but they were the same decisions that any one of those senior leaders could have made on their own.  Which begs the question: why have a team, when everyone at the table is the same?

Eric Peterson

In addition to being a major mensch, Eric Peterson is also Manager, Diversity & Inclusion, Society for Human Resource Management.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Why Women by Eric Peterson is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Most Guys Don’t See It

Guys generally do not “get it”.  Indeed on a whole host of questions, for example “Is there discrimination in the workplace?” the answers by gender are very different. Men see no problem at all or much less of a problem than women do. Therefor an appeal to advance more women based on a moral perspective will likely be pretty ineffective. But a “hard nosed” business argument supporting diversity in general is crucial to progress especially in the US where quotas are simply not going to happen.

So in my view as long as advancing women in leadership is seen as a “women’s issue”  progress will be slow. It needs to be seen as

1. A Diversity Issue

It has to be framed as broader than women, otherwise it gets discounted as special pleading. This is especially true as many attempts at corporate fixes are delegated to HR which is typically disproportionately female.

2. A Crucial Business Issue

Those Who See It

As to the personal reasons, this might be of interest. A former colleague of mine, now Chief Diversity Officer at a major corporation, did a survey of what she called her “male allies” – senior men, not in HR, who were supporters of the firm’s efforts to advance women into more leadership positions. She thought there might be common factors such as having daughters or strong mothers who had been powerful influences. Based on an admittedly small sample and anecdotal discussions she concluded these men indeed shared one common trait – a strong sense of “fairness.” They could all see that something was “wrong” and that an important group of colleagues was not progressing as they should.

Adam Quinton

Adam is Adjunct Associate Professor, Columbia University School of International and Public Affairs

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Why Women by Adam Quinton is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Clues that appear in groups of three capture my attention, as they often foretell an emerging pattern.

What was a possible future trend is about to show up as an undeniable reality.

This week the following clues announced themselves.

1. The host of a radio sends an email to schedule an interview about NOW Leadership. We’ve met before, but his email includes an introduction. It reads:

“The show is hosted by author, business expert, and husband to Michigan’s Governor Granholm, Dan Mulhern and airs across the entire state of Michigan on The Michigan Talk Network.

This marks the first time, in my experience, a professional man chooses to introduce himself as “the husband of……” before mentioning his own name.

In case you’re interested, the program airs Saturday March 26 from 7am-9am EST. You can find it under the radio corner tab at www.danmulhern.com.

2. Four professional women meet for lunch in New York City. One member of our party shares that she and her husband decided years ago he would be the stay-at-home with their four children, while she pursued and achieved a high powered career in the financial industry.

3. I receive a copy of a Financial Times (UK) article by Lucy Kellaway who discovered that of the top 50 women global CEOs only one is married to a man who carries the scent or the role of an “alpha male.” Here’s an excerpt from the article.

Indra Nooyi, CEO of Pepsi and the world’s most powerful businesswoman, is married to a man who quit his job and became a consultant to fit in with his wife and children. Ditto with Irene Rosenfeld at Kraft, whose husband decided to be self-employed 20 years ago to help her. Ditto with Ursula Burns at Xerox.

What Does the Future Hold?

Our roles as men and women are turning upside down and inside out.

The wave has not reached our shores but if you look towards the horizon you can see it approaching. The tipping point, where it unfolds and comes crashing forward, is not far behind.

These 50 women and men, my colleague in New York and her husband, along with many others are at the forefront. They are setting a tone for and leading us to a new era. It will change your business and the workforce.

Are You Ready?

Are you and your company preparing NOW?

Are you asking the right questions, setting the right policies, changing as needed?

Are you prepared for your new customers, the companies these women lead? Do you know what they want and need; how they think; and how they make business decisions?

No?

Better get started.

NOW!

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

The Future: Upside Down & Inside Out is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

You are About to Enter

the mind of a woman. As more women rise to positions of power you have before you an opportunity to learn how we (or at least some of us) make important business decisions – the one’s that affect whether you get hired or whether your company wins our business.

Meet Sara

Sara, a real client whose name has been changed, is a rising star in the xxx industry, and I am her coach. Sara hired me on her own and pays for my coaching services. Sara works for the zzz corporation where she was promoted four times in the past two years during a period of rapid growth for the company. Sara is invaluable because she addresses needs and solves problems before others even see them. In addition, she develops her employees, creates a culture of collaboration and a passion for excellence. Several acquisitions have created opportunities for Sara to expand her reach, learn and prove herself in more aspects of the business. What her employers don’t know is that they will soon be competing with Sara when she and a co-worker start their own company some time in the next six months.

Inside the Locker Room

Sara has granted permission for you to eavesdrop on one of our recent conversations.

Sara: I went out to lunch with our CEO and two execs from our top vendor the other day. I was the only woman at the table except for the waitress. I couldn’t believe these guys. They never made eye contact with the waitress, the bus boy or any of the other wait staff. One of them even snapped his fingers to call her over. I’m sitting there thinking, “That could be me waiting tables.” In fact, I have waited tables.

Me: You’ve got some good examples of how you don’t want to treat people.

Sara: Wait, that’s not even the worst part. When we get up from the table, I notice one of the guys from our vendor company – his fly was open the whole time.  So he’s been treating the staff like they’re not at his level, like he’s better than they are, and meanwhile this guy’s sitting there with his fly open.

Me: What did you do?

Sara: After they left, I went back and left the waitress a bigger tip.

Me: Why?

Sara: I felt badly for the way they treated her, and I was part of the group. I felt responsible.

Me: Nice move. What did you learn?

Sara: These vendors won’t be doing business with us when Steve and I start our company. They think it’s all about the pricing, the product, the service, the fancy lunches. Well for me a big piece is how you treat people. Not just how you treat me when you’re trying to win or keep my business but how you treat the guy on the street, the cab driver, the waitress. They may be unconscious, but I’m not. I’m watching, and I’m more interested in how you are and who you are when you’re not trying to impress me.

The Locker Room Take Away

So, for Sara, who will soon be running her own very successful business, the expression “It’s all about relationships,” really means “Its all about all relationships all the time.” Best to know that if you’re going to do business with her.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Ladies Locker Room: Sneak a Peek If You Dare is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

This month’s carnival features elephants, astronauts, several family acts and a king & queen duet. The finishing touch includes just a dash of x-rated language.

21st Century Leadership…Lessons from Julie Payette

Gwyn Teatro at You’re Not the Boss of Me says the 21st century leader must effectively manage across borders; collaborate for optimal results; and build strong connections with others, among other things. Gwyn introduces Canadian astronaut Julie Payette and her perspective from outer space, as one example of such a leader. A short video demonstrates what Gwyn has in mind.

A Revealing Look at One of the Dirty Words of Business

Tanveer Naseer reveals low levels of trust among employees for CEOs. He looks deep into the research to find trust is higher for female CEOs and provides insight as to why. Have hope, he also says there is something all leaders can do to improve trust.

Facebook’s He-Leader She-Leader Duo – Together They are Saving the Company

Anne Perschel at Germane Consulting (that’s me) reviews the combined strengths of the dynamic duo at the helm of Facebook as a premier example of what a HE-Leader and SHE-Leader can accomplish together.

I’m Mad as Hell

Chrysula at Work.Life.Balance. is bringing on the elephants – the ones that every one sees but no one discusses. Well Chrysula has called them out. She thinks the men vs. women thing is the wrong conversation and we should be talking about these elephants instead.

Do Feelings Have a Place in Business?

Jane Perdue at Get Your Leadership Big On has a strong opinion on this one. She starts with the following conversation

“I don’t consider your blog a business blog,”  he said.

“Why not?” she inquired.

“Because you write about behaviors, relationships and understanding yourself. Those aren’t business topics,” he explained.

Goodness, how insightful!

Top 10 Female Icons

Lindsay Samuels of  librarysciencedegree.org provides a needed resource for women, their coaches, mentors, managers and guides – a list of characters who when faced with challenges do not swoon, faint, or wait for Prince Charming to make things better. Instead they take care of business themselves.

A New Kind of Leadership

Dave McQueen at Simply Magnificent hopes that someday when people are asked to name leaders who are their role models, they will think of women too and he makes the case for why this should be so.

Who are Better Leaders? Moms or Dads

Roberta Hill over at Eclectic Change asks a trick question and turns to her own family history for the answer.

How Could I Not Believe

Paul McConaughy, at FURI, real life manager and leader, reflects on what he learned from women, notably those in his own family, about leadership.

Does Size Matter? A Question for Women Biz Owners?

Cherry Woodburn, Bordeless Thinking, takes issue with the Wall Street Journal article entitled What’s Holding Back Women Entrepreneurs?  She argues that business size is not the only measure of success and makes it clear that women have valid reasons for not becoming too big.

Heart felt thanks to all our friends and colleagues who have contributed to this month’s carnival. You are each among the best colleagues we could hope for. Thank you. Together we are doing this NOW.

P.S. There were other excellent submissions. We’d like to have included each and every one but committed to make the cut at ten and are keeping that promise. We hope that all of you will continue to submit in the future.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

NOW Leadership Carnival – October 2010 is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Introducing NOW

Welcome to the NOW Leadership carnival. This short story describes the carnival’s intent as well as the kind of posts you will find and can submit here.

For many years a renowned pianist played only the white keys because that is the way he was taught. And that is the way his teacher was taught. One day our accomplished pianist accidentally struck a black key. The sound was sour to his ear. He reverted to playing the white keys, but his curiosity was piqued and he returned to strike the black keys more and more frequently. He grew to like the sound, and over time began to play music using only the black keys. But soon with another slip of the fingers he hit a black key and a white key at the same time and an entirely new sound emerged. He called it hermony. It was neither the sound of the white key, nor the sound of the black key but a unique sound created when the vibrations from each co-mingled in a previously unoccupied space.

The music of 21st century leader is neither feminine or masculine. It is a third sound created in the previously unoccupied space where feminine and masculine attributes meet. We call it NOW Leadership.

NOW leaders work collaboratively. They know success comes through relationships. They are emotionally savvy, think intuitively and build communities involving workers, customers, vendors and other stakeholders. They are logical and make tough decisions. They take difficult even unpopular stands when called for. But they do so while caring for and about people. In fact, they often involve those most affected by the problem in creating solutions. They support others and deliver tough messages with the utmost respect.  They care for individuals but not at the expense of the overall good. They focus on people, knowing the results will follow. Whereas others focus on results thinking that people will follow. Their businesses do well by doing good. NOW leaders think with their brains, their minds and their hearts.

Our goal is to further the adoption and the adaptation of NOW leadership. Please join us by reading, forwarding and submitting you ideas for consideration. We don’t promise to post everything we receive. At least not for NOW as we are limiting the Carnival to include up to 10 posts that advance the agenda of leadership for NOW. And if you’d like include what you think the acronym N.O.W. does or should stand for. We look forward to seeing you again in mid-October.

Most Sincerely,

Marion Chapsal and Anne Perschel

September’s Articles

Marica Reynolds, author of Wander Woman, says her male friends have convinced her that she’s wrong for praising the differences between women and men. Marcia’s article includes a link to evidence from brain research supporting the view that behaviors related to gender differences are learned. She concludes that these same behaviors can be unlearned or never learned in the first place. Brain Tip #97: Stop Praising the Differences in Men and Women

Steve Blank, Vietnam veteran, serial entrepreneur and professor of entrepreneurship at U.C. Berkeley, Stanford University and the Columbia University/Berkeley Joint Executive MBA program, is not as hopeful as Marcia. He shares lessons to his daughters about the game of business. “Office politics is just an older version of boys with sticks. There is testosterone. There is a hierarchy. It is competitive. [When] I win you lose.” Steve’s cites many examples of the different rules by which boys and girls – men and women – play. Boys Rules, Girls Lose – Women at Work

Marion Chapsal, Gernimo Leadership Coaching, is burning with indignation, passion and clear determination to offer a new vision, one that does not rely on men for advice on how women should be. She is not soft, quiet or gentle but rebellious, daring and revolutionary when she asks the question “Should Mad Men Give Career Advice to Women?” and then answers, “No, Thanks!“ Read more here

Speaking of revolutions, Tim Hurson advises business leaders and experts to reconsider their love affair with results and achievement. He claims these masculine concepts lead to the economic meltdown. Tim suggests that instead we should focus on the emotional reward of performing well and working for meaning – more feminine oriented ideas. Read Our Love Affair with Results Reconsidered.

In contrast to Tim’s view of male and female concepts, Jennifer V. Miller of the People Equation claims that the popular media presents false images of effective leadership as being either masculine or feminine. She believes effectiveness is dictated by the situation not by gender. Read Leadership Integrates Both Genders

Cherry Woodburn at Borderless Thinking takes issue, to put it mildly, against Washington Post Kathleen Parker’s depiction of President Obama as displaying feminine, and clearly less than desirable, leadership traits. Cherry’s post reminds me of Madeline Albright’s statement, “There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.” Spot on Ms. Cherry. Read Cherry’s most clever retort to Ms. Parker

What’s Missing from the Halls of Power, my contribution, argues that half of humanity does not, cannot and should not be expected to have all the talent needed to lead all of humanity. The Rule of 3 demonstrates how to make the needed changes so the full range of human talents are part of your company’s portfolio. Read What’s Missing in the Halls of Power.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

The NOW Leadership Carnival – Premier Edition is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

I spent many a lecture in graduate school waiting for the sages to utter pearls of wisdom. It happened twice, and both times the statements were profoundly simple. Marv Weisbord spoke these words a long time ago and I remember the essence but not the exactness of what he said. I’ve added my own experience to the mix as well. (Hope it’s okay with you Marv.)

The consultant sees and names what’s missing, such that the clients find it for themselves.

The feminine way of perceiving, thinking, making meaning, and being in the world has long been missing from the halls of power. Feminine is relational, nurturing, concerned with building community, empathic, intuitive, and expands to incorporate vs. conquer the other (think pregnancy). Feminine has her shadow and masculine has one of his own. Each helps to keep the shadow of the other in check. We call it balance, the yin and yang,

I advocate passionately, cajole, humor, argue, push, and do whatever is needed to give the feminine perspective a seat, preferably three seats, at tables where important issues are considered and decided. In her book, Women Lead the Way, Linda Tarr-Whelan argues that when the table is comprised of  30% women the conversations change. I have seen this happen. And Jane Perdue, who was part of a fem-trio at the senior leadership table in the cable and communications industry, says three became a powerful game changer.

Why do I advocate for the feminine view – a perspective that is also within and can be presented by men? Because it’s what’s missing, and it’s been missing for several hundred years. If the masculine was missing, I’d advocate for that.

Either one alone is only half of what humanity is and can be. Together we are more than twice as much.

Gratitude to my dear colleague Marion Chapsal for insisting on interviewing me as part of our work on a top secret project. By doing so she inspired this post. She also provided the top image. Merci mon soeur. Co-labor-ate. It’s what we do.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

What’s Missing in the Halls of Power? is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Laura J. Daley , a savvy business woman, turned me on to a terrific well-written article about the future of women in large corporations and the future of corporations if they don’t succeed in getting more women to top leadership roles. Andrés Tapia, Hewett’s Chief Diversity Officer and Emerging Workforce Solutions Leader says more women in leadership roles should be “hard-wired” into the overall company strategy. He offers recommendations that reach beyond best practices for achieving this goal.

To read Andrés’ paper, click here.

My comments on his piece appear below.

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

Women in Leadership: At the Cross-Roads (written by a man) is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology

Watch the world’s business leaders make the case for more women in leadership roles. It will take a few seconds for the debate to begin.

SHARE YOUR VIEWS

Who was most convincing? Why?

How do conversations and decisions change with more women in the room?

©2012 Germane Insights. All Rights Reserved.

The Gender Agenda – from The World Economic Forum at Davos is an original post from Anne Perschel on Germane Insights - Achieving Leadership Excellence through the Art and Science of Psychology